"Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised." ~ Proverbs 31:30

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

When Life Just Happens

I pounded the steering wheel in frustration and anger.


I shouted at no one, ready to cry.  I couldn't remember being quite this angry in a looooong time.

Why, God?  Why?


Two of the things I loathe most in this world are disappointing people and being late.  I dislike going back on my word, I dislike not carrying out a responsibility that was expected of me, and I greatly dislike showing up at a given place 2 minutes after I'm supposed to be there.

This morning I was supposed to get re-certified to sell alcohol and tobacco for my job as a checker at the grocery store.  It's good for two years, and my two years were up last month.  Not that I minded much.  What can I say?  I much prefer the freedom of movement that the jobs of bagging, pushing carts, and running returns bring as opposed to being cooped up at a single register for 8 hours.  Oh no, I didn't mind the expiration of certification at all.

Buuut, my managers prefer having as many checkers on hand as possible, and so back to my AST I was to go.  At least, that was the plan.

Instead, I got hopelessly lost because a certain site on which one can obtain directions completely went bonkers and left me going in circles.

I may not have wanted to get re-certified, meaning I could get stuck at a check stand at the drop of a hat, but I certainly didn't want to disappoint my managers by not showing up to said class.  And so, I gave it a try, even when the clock in Big Blue read 14 after (they don't let you in a single minute after the time you're supposed to arrive).

Oh.

I. Was. Mad.

When I got home, I went on an angry run, trying to pound away my frustration one footfall after the other.  It didn't work.  I got home still blazing mad!

It just continued to eat away at me that I let my managers down and that I was so beyond late that I eventually just turned around and went home, not even showing up to say that I did indeed make an effort to get there.

Oh goodness.

Letting these types of things go is NOT a strength of mine.

The good news?  God is still in control.


Even though I let down the people I love, God is still in control.


Even though I never show up at all, God is still in control.


This lesson is a hard one for me to learn, but God is still in control.

Amen and amen.  God is good.  ALL the time.



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